Giving Thanks in All Things

September 27, 2020 | Proper 21 | Psalm 78:1-4, 12-16 | The Rev. John Reese

The late Phyllis Diller frequently remarked that “most children threaten at times to run away from home. This is the only thing that keeps some parents going.”

Being a parent is not for the faint of heart. Yes, a newborn child is a “bundle of joy.” But very soon, he’s a handful of aggravation. That’s because children quickly develop a mind and a will of their own.

What’s a parent to do? They Google “parenting” and buy a cartload of books. That’s what they do. Or, they adopt President Harry Truman’s strategy, who said, “I have found the best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want to do and then advise them to do it.”

Parents should be encouraged by the news that the discipline of children is not a new concern. It’s been the topic of uncountable conversations in kitchens, bedrooms, classrooms, churches — and around ancient campfires before the wheel was invented.

Clearly, Adam and Eve had issues with their two boys, Cain and Abel. Jacob’s 12 sons were a contentious lot and conspired to get rid of one of the youngest brothers. The old priest Eli had evil children, and his protégé Samuel didn’t fare much better as a father and parent.

And then we have perhaps the most famous parenting dictum of all: “Spare the rod, spoil the child,” a text which alone has justified the beatings of more children than we can possibly imagine. Now this phrase does not appear in the Bible, but comes from the pen of the 17th-century writer, Samuel Butler, in his poem, “Hudibras.” Still, many parents believe the expression comes from the Bible because of the sentiment expressed in Proverbs 13:24: “Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them.”

What’s unfortunate is that many parents believe that the rod of Proverbs 13:24 is a heavy stick or branch. Not so. The rod is an image set squarely in the agrarian culture of the day. Shepherds always had a rod. Sometimes it was an instrument of comfort (see Psalm 23). The curved end of a shepherd’s rod was designed to wrap around the neck of an errant sheep and pull them out of a ditch or abyss. The rest of the rod was used primarily as a guide to keep sheep on a path with merely a tap or touch.

But parents, in the history of child discipline, have used sticks, branches, rulers, baseball bats, and straps to beat children into submission. The old woodshed has become a romantic meme of a former time in which a miscreant could be taught by his father the error of his ways with a simple visit to the woodshed.

In the Reese house of the 1960s, my father used his belt while mother favored an old broomstick that no longer had any broom straws.  But I was fleet afoot.  Although a pudgy kid, I could move like a jackrabbit as soon as I saw dad unbuckle his belt or mom move to the broomstick corner of the kitchen.  In a flash, I was out the door and two blocks away.

Some parents, however, don’t like to spank their children. Many parents will put a child in “timeout” so the kid will have an opportunity to calm down, take a breath and re-enter the world of gracious living without causing upset and commotion.

But other parents do not believe timeout is an appropriate response. In fact, some do not believe in punishing a child at all. One writer suggests that “all punishments are ineffective … because the vast majority of kids don’t misbehave; they behave. They behave like kids.”

It’s clear that God does not share that opinion. In the Psalm for today (only eight of the 72 verses of Psalm 78), we see only the goodness of God. But to understand the psalm’s intent, a full reading is necessary. When we do so, we find that God is having none of this business of letting kids be kids. God understands that they’re behaving like children — misbehaving children.

This psalm, the second longest in the psalter (after Psalm 119), is a brief history of this relationship between the divine Parent and his incorrigible kids.

God makes a case that the Israelites had forgotten their patron deity — the God of their ancestors — and that, as the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, he had been rather diligent and devoted. No one could seriously argue that Yahweh had failed them, neglected them or rejected them. He had been their God, and they had been his people. The Israelites not only took these blessings for granted, but, by their wicked behavior, insulted the One who provided them.

The psalmist prepares an itemized list of misdemeanors and wrongful acts by which the Israelites pretty much thumbed their noses at God. They laughed and did whatever they pleased. According to one pundit, they acted like teenagers who complain there’s nothing to do, and then stay out all night doing it. “In spite of all this they still sinned; they did not believe in his wonders” (v. 32).

When children behave badly, we understand that they do this because they’re children. Their world is quite narrow, and they are the center of it. So children do not always understand that parents — being parents — often act in ways the children do not understand, and will never understand, because they are children and lack the cognitive and reasoning skills necessary for a mature and reasonable discussion.

Comedian Jim Gaffigan says, in reference to the Cat Stevens song: “The song goes, ‘Morning has broken,’ and I’m pretty sure my children broke it. And like everything else they break, if they did break it, they’ll never admit it.”

This seems to be the case with the ancient Israelites. It is a mark of our maturity as Christians if we understand that God is God and we are not, that God demonstrates his love for us in many different ways. Only immature Christians would display any of the behaviors of the ancient Israelites. Let’s not end up in time-out.

Instead, let’s express gratitude for the blessings in our lives. Give thanks to God for the good things that come our way — even things that God perhaps had nothing to with.

God did not give you that promotion you got at work; thank God anyway.

God did not give your football team that victory; thank God anyway.

God did not give you that A on your exam; thank God anyway.

God did not give you that parking space at the store’s front door; thank God anyway. And so on.

In fact, the Bible says we should give thanks in all things (1 Thessalonians 5:18).

God did not cause the kitchen sink to back up; give God thanks for the plumber who came and fixed it.

God did not give your spouse cancer; give God thanks for the skillful care of oncologists and nurses.

God did not cancel in-person attendance at Lightning and Rays games this year; thank God you can watch them on television.

God did not cause Covid-19.  Be grateful for the health care workers who are healing the sick and the scientists who are working on vaccines.

God did not cause so-and-so to say bad things about you; be grateful for the friends you have. And so on.

This psalm challenges us to live in such a way that a “timeout” will not even be on the table.

In fact, rather than being timeout Christians, the Bible calls us to be time-in Christians. We’re called to spend time:

In serving others;

In study and prayer;

In offering our skills and talents;

In witnessing to the love of Christ;

In obedience to the word of God;

In fellowship with other believers;

In bearing the burdens of others.

When we’re living as time-in Christians, we won’t need to worry about timeout. So let’s not give God a headache. Let’s live right. And be grateful.